I have a very good friend that is on POF. She is looking for a friendship, possibly leading to a relationship, possibly leading to marriage. She is not an escort. She goes on a few dates a week with men from POF. She will not go on a coffee date until she gets a feel for what kind of person the person is. That requires a few notes back and forth. If my friend went for coffee with every guy that asked her, she would be going for coffee a few times a day.
It is smart to see if there is some kind of rapport before meeting. Remember that you might be sending out a hundred notes, but so are a hundred other guys if the girl is anything close to attractive. My friend is beautiful, in a very classic way, so she gets lots of mail. All of them wanting to meet her. You weed out the ones that are idiots so you are left with 50, then weed out the ones that seem to have creepy intent, then you are left with maybe 20, weed out the ones that come across as neanderthals, then you are left with 5, lol
As an escort, it doesn't really matter to me if we have things in common, because I can mold myself to fit you, (unless you are a hunter. I really have trouble separating myself, once I know you like to kill animals for fun

) For friendship and dating, you need to see if the basics are there, which might take quite a few emails.
If I were you, I would not introduce a girl to your sarcastic side before you know her. She might not get it through the written word. Always be polite, charming, disarming, but not girly, hahaha. Its a fine balancing act.
Good luck, to all of you. I hope you all find true love or at least really good sex.
I for one will never be on any of those sites. I love being foot loose and fancy free.
