Alcohol

[westwoody]

My family has a terrible history with booze.
Both parents were drunks. Mother a chronic alcoholic, father binge drinker.
I could never have friends over because my mom was nuts. My dad hid his really well, everyone thought he was great guy, pillar of the community, but behind closed doors he was just a drunk asshole.
My brother has problems but pretends he is a wine connoisseur. If we go to a restaurant he will chug down a bottle or two. But he doesn't consider wine to be an alcoholic beverage. Yeah, denial.
I only deal with it by abstinence, I was a violent crazy drunk, even by army standards.
My sister has always been a heavy drinker. She deals with stress by drinking. The last time I visited she was right out of it. I stayed with her a few days in spring and every evening she would start drinking after dinner. She drank hard liquor til past midnight.
Now it is affecting her job. She is missing time and generally fucking up. She has a really good management job but I fear she may lose it. Basically they told her to take time off and clean up or don't come back. So now she is stressed about losing her job, and she is dealing with the stress by drinking.
I have tried everything to help, she will not listen to any advice.
She admits she has a "bit of an issue" and says she will try and deal with it. But nothing changes.

Now my best friend is going down the same road.

Fuck fuck fuck.....and if you try to stop there are always asshole who try to get you to drink. "One won't hurt" they say. But if you are an alcoholic one does hurt. For someone with an alcohol problem, you are either clean and sober, or you are drunk. There is no in between.

For the love of God people, if someone has a problem don't encourage them to drink.
If you do you are no different than a meth pusher.

I fucking hate alcohol for what is has done to everyone I love.

 

[Oldfart]

Does the Vancouver area have a good alcohol addiction treatment program that does not cost an arm and a leg, and does not require any "steps" that involve religion?

 

[jgg]

Stay strong and true ww.

 

[MRGREEN]

Close friend drank himself to death a couple of years ago. No matter what did or how hard we tried we couldn't get through. Family history, Father, brother and anger issues.

Peace
MG

 

[westwoody]

It is so hard watching someone destroy themselves, and you cannot stop them.

 

[Jethro Bodine]

Unfortunately we can’t help any of these folks until the decide the want to get better. Unfortunately it is often after they’ve hit rock bottom.
I recall someone telling me that with addicts or alcoholics there are 3 outcomes, 2 of them bad. They either stay the same, get help/ better or they die.

J

 

[jgg]

they die.

J

It's the same outcome for all of us. Some suffer more and are quicker at it. Maybe not by choice.

 

[sevenofnine]

my two cents

I don't think you can blame the booze,

its that saying guns don't kill people,,, people do,

my father was a raging alcoholic an abusive one too, jailed, etc etc,

um it wasn't just the booze, it was him personally ,
he used the booze as a drug a medication,
he thought it would fix his life or some dam thing,

you listen to him talk he had a big hole some where in his life,
and instead of fixing it, he drowned it in booze. and all the anger and frustration came out.
booze is just an excuse in my opinion,

I know they classify alcoholism as a disease,
I don't really buy that,, from what I have seen its more a personality issues a character flaw.

I drink, like to drink get a buzz on actually
I understand, booze,
it doesn't take the pain away the emptiness away,
it puts you in a place where you don't care any more.


I think it also gives you freedom to be you,
I fucking hate raging mad drunks, with a passion.

I never drink when I am mad or upset,
im a happy drunk actually, the only way to be

not enough do I drink though, to be an alcoholic though I do enjoy it.

 

[Ms Erica Phoenix]

Unfortunately we can’t help any of these folks until the decide the want to get better. Unfortunately it is often after they’ve hit rock bottom.
I recall someone telling me that with addicts or alcoholics there are 3 outcomes, 2 of them bad. They either stay the same, get help/ better or they die.

J

The 'liturgy' of the 12 Step program says that addiction, unchecked, leads to three places; jails, institutions & death.

 

[Damaged]

my two cents

I don't think you can blame the booze,

its that saying guns don't kill people,,, people do,

my father was a raging alcoholic an abusive one too, jailed, etc etc,

um it wasn't just the booze, it was him personally ,
he used the booze as a drug a medication,
he thought it would fix his life or some dam thing,

you listen to him talk he had a big hole some where in his life,
and instead of fixing it, he drowned it in booze. and all the anger and frustration came out.
booze is just an excuse in my opinion,

I know they classify alcoholism as a disease,
I don't really buy that,, from what I have seen its more a personality issues a character flaw.

I drink, like to drink get a buzz on actually
I understand, booze,
it doesn't take the pain away the emptiness away,
it puts you in a place where you don't care any more.


I think it also gives you freedom to be you,
I fucking hate raging mad drunks, with a passion.

I never drink when I am mad or upset,
im a happy drunk actually, the only way to be

not enough do I drink though, to be an alcoholic though I do enjoy it.

I agree, if it wasn't alcohol it would be some other drug of choice. The person has issues, not because of the drug of their choice.

 

[Ms Erica Phoenix]

my two cents

I don't think you can blame the booze,

its that saying guns don't kill people,,, people do,

my father was a raging alcoholic an abusive one too, jailed, etc etc,

um it wasn't just the booze, it was him personally ,
he used the booze as a drug a medication,
he thought it would fix his life or some dam thing,

you listen to him talk he had a big hole some where in his life,
and instead of fixing it, he drowned it in booze. and all the anger and frustration came out.
booze is just an excuse in my opinion,

I know they classify alcoholism as a disease,
I don't really buy that,, from what I have seen its more a personality issues a character flaw.

I drink, like to drink get a buzz on actually
I understand, booze,
it doesn't take the pain away the emptiness away,
it puts you in a place where you don't care any more.


I think it also gives you freedom to be you,
I fucking hate raging mad drunks, with a passion.

I never drink when I am mad or upset,
im a happy drunk actually, the only way to be

not enough do I drink though, to be an alcoholic though I do enjoy it.

I don't often say this...but your observation is spot on; the booze is a way of filling an inner emptiness, or self-medicating a mental illness. Alcoholism is NOT the disease; it's a symptom.

 

[take8easy]

It is strange how it works within a family sometimes. One kid follows parents' footsteps and drowns her/his life in bottle and other learns from their mistakes and grows up detesting alcohol. A college time friend was a prime example. His father drank, his older brother drank, his younger brother died of alcohol abuse and he himself was a VERY moderate drinker. I remember his exact words, that he grew up seeing his drunk father acting like a pig.


Sadly what said you is a chapter almost everyone of us have read so many times. If not within immediate family, it is a friend or a colleague.

 

[maniacalone]

It is strange how it works within a family sometimes. One kid follows parents' footsteps and drowns her/his life in bottle and other learns from their mistakes and grows up detesting alcohol. A college time friend was a prime example. His father drank, his older brother drank, his younger brother died of alcohol abuse and he himself was a VERY moderate drinker. I remember his exact words, that he grew up seeing his drunk father acting like a pig.


Sadly what said you is a chapter almost everyone of us have read so many times. If not within immediate family, it is a friend or a colleague.

Biology or environmental determining that fate? I am for one unsure. Genetics may cause it to become a disease of predetermined addiction to it

 

[take8easy]

Biology or environmental determining that fate? I am for one unsure. Genetics may cause it to become a disease of predetermined addiction to it

I do believe genetics do play a role. Although environment has to be a big factor as well. Some people have the propensity towards addiction/substance abuse so despite being in the right environment, they might gravitate towards things like alcohol.

 

[westwoody]

Yes my sister is like my mom in so many ways, drinking behaviour is more discreet but looks identical.
My brother is like my dad in looks and mentality, both post grad degrees in hard science, both secret drunks in denial.
I don't know why I am so different. Maybe for me sobriety is my form of rebellion.

 

[storm rider]

OK is this topic related to the heavy consumption of hard liquor such as scotch/rum/vodka etc?Or is it directed at pissheads like me that like to drink beer( I also craft brew my own) and I will say I do enjoy my beer.From lagers to ales with lots of hop profiles as well as the malt profiles as well as the interesting adjuncts used for brewing that I use such as bitter lemon peel/crushed corriander seed/bacon/star anise and so on.

SR

 

[Quarter Mile'r]

I don't often say this...but your observation is spot on; the booze is a way of filling an inner emptiness, or self-medicating a mental illness. Alcoholism is NOT the disease; it's a symptom.

I'm with you and those you quoted Ms Erica. Watching a program the other night they said that Alcohol changes
the brain and so therefore changes the way you perceive every iota of the world around you.

No different than any other substance but just a little more horrible in how subtle alcohol can be before anyone
really notices that they have REALLY changed for the worse in the long run. Known as Alcoholism.
This in itself is where they call it a disease when it gets to that point because it has gone beyond the persons
ability to admit, control or do something about it on their own. Usually.

And when you combine a long term Alcoholism with an inner problem that was a precursor to the alcohol
(aka self medicating for) you have a problem with adding a drug that literally drowns the victim
mentally to a point of no return. Makes no difference, alcohol or any other drug abused.

Down the path to destruction one way or the other unless they can pull themselves out of it and
hopefully have help to prop themselves up to get there.

Drink responsibly my friends, enjoy a few with good buddies and family but for god sakes know when
to put the cork back in the bottle. There will be another time to say............

Cheers All!! :thumb:





......................QM'r