When do you call a girl? (ladies or germs, some advice please!)

[CJ Tylers]

Hi everyone,

I'm not talking about anything to do with the hobby... I mean, if a girl gives you her number and tells you to call her (in an email), but the two of you haven't been in constant correspondance.... when's the best time to call her?

I told her I'd give her a call some time this weekend (we're both really busy with work and stuff)... but now I'm agonizing over when a "good time to call" is.

It's got to be this weekend, otherwise I'd be breaking my word (which I have no intent to do)...and I haven't heard back from her as of yet since she gave me her number...

Any suggestions on good timing would be appreciated!

 

[muffdiver]

You don't want to look like a poor desperate soul, so i would give her a call sunday morning but not to early. Maybe suggest to meet for a mid afternoon coffee or whatever. Goodluck CJ.

 

[TotallyTouchin]

Me

And for me only...the guys that I end up dating are always the ones who just take the straight approach and call me right away. It shows that there are no games...they're totally stoked to talk to me and that they have no confidence issues etc. I would never be like "oh this dude has to be desperate cause he CALLED ME!"

The thing is...we LIKE it when you call us right away. We like it when we just left a date and you call us back and tell us that you had a blast and just wanted to say goodnight again. Those guys have been the ones who completely stood out for me. Just shows thought.

You never want to be the weird dude who calls ten times and whatnot but a quick call just to be like "it was great meeting you...I'm totally excited to take you out and I'm thinking about it right now so I just wanted to call you to tell you"...makes a girl feel totally important and like the guy is one of those confident characters we are all attracted to.

This myth goes around that people should wait to call and blah blah whatever is sooooooo 10 years ago. If you're thinking of her...give her a quick call to say hi...say she's great and hot and you like her and that's that. WE LOVE that stuff...ladies???? Can I get an amen?

Have fun in any case CJT!

 

[JustAGuy]

It's a fairly safe bet that four in the morning would be the wrong time. Other than that rather obvious example of when not to call, I don't understand the agonizing over when to call. It's just a phone call, right? You're not asking her to marry you? Pick up the phone and dial the numbers, C.J.

 

[BC_Boy]

And for me only...the guys that I end up dating are always the ones who just take the straight approach and call me right away. It shows that there are no games...they're totally stoked to talk to me and that they have no confidence issues etc. I would never be like "oh this dude has to be desperate cause he CALLED ME!"

The thing is...we LIKE it when you call us right away. We like it when we just left a date and you call us back and tell us that you had a blast and just wanted to say goodnight again. Those guys have been the ones who completely stood out for me. Just shows thought.

You never want to be the weird dude who calls ten times and whatnot but a quick call just to be like "it was great meeting you...I'm totally excited to take you out and I'm thinking about it right now so I just wanted to call you to tell you"...makes a girl feel totally important and like the guy is one of those confident characters we are all attracted to.

This myth goes around that people should wait to call and blah blah whatever is sooooooo 10 years ago. If you're thinking of her...give her a quick call to say hi...say she's great and hot and you like her and that's that. WE LOVE that stuff...ladies???? Can I get an amen?

Have fun in any case CJT!

based on my experience, you are the exception rather than the norm.

anyways back to the original post, if you told her you'd call her this weekend, then anytime today or sunday.

 

[Jaman50]

Simple Rules ..

Week-days after 9 AM ... Before 8 PM

Weekends After 10:30 AM ... Before 9:30 PM

 

[BC_Boy]

what i've been told:

- call 2-4 days after u get her number.
- call within 2 days after a date (say u had a great time) but not on the same day/night as the date.
- don't normally call more than twice a week
- keep phone calls 3-5 minutes long
- the guy should be the one who ends the call.
- have a reason to call (i.e. ask her out)
- leave concise voicemails
- if you leave voicemails and she doesn't return them three times in a row, she aint interested. move on

 

[CJ Tylers]

Well, given my work and stuff that's happened (funeral, family etc)... tomorrow is going to be the first time I can actually call her at a reasonable time...so I guess I'll shoot for 11am.


Normally I wouldn't think twice about it, but she's a nice girl and I've been single for quite some time...a bit rusty at it and I'd rather start things off properly.

 

[georgebushmoron]

Rule of thumb is 3 days to make 1st call for the average girl. If she is very sought after by many men, calling too early is going to show her you're just another one of the average. If nobody finds her attractive, call whenever, it does not matter. When you call, it's usually best to give a reason, no matter how lame. Another handy thing to have ready is a plan as to what to do when you meet.

As for games, sorry TT, but dating in the beginning is a game any way you look at it. Almost all try to put their best foot forward in the beginning. Yet most people start stepping into reality sooner rather than later, however.

 

[BC_Boy]

Rule of thumb is 3 days to make 1st call for the average girl. If she is very sought after by many men, calling too early is going to show her you're just another one of the average. If nobody finds her attractive, call whenever, it does not matter. When you call, it's usually best to give a reason, no matter how lame. Another handy thing to have ready is a plan as to what to do when you meet.

As for games, sorry TT, but dating in the beginning is a game any way you look at it. Almost all try to put their best foot forward in the beginning. Yet most people start stepping into reality sooner rather than later, however.

well said. both guys and girls say that they hate playing games, but both end up playing them.

its not about what women want, its about what gets them to respond in your desired way.

 

[Devils_Advocate]

Six days... Swingers

MIKE
How long do I wait to call?

TRENT
A day.

MIKE
Tomorrow?

TRENT
No...

SUE
... Tomorrow, then a day.

TRENT
... Yeah.

MIKE
So, two days?

TRENT
Yeah. I guess you could call it that.

SUE
Definitely. Two days. That's the
industry standard...

TRENT
(to Sue. shop talk)
... I used to wait two days. Now
everyone waits two days. Three days is
kinda money now, don't you think?

SUE
... Yeah. But two's enough not to look
anxious...

TRENT
Yeah, but three days is kinda the
money...

MIKE
(interrupting sarcastically)
Why don't I just wait three weeks and
tell her I was cleaning out my wallet and
found her number...

CHARLES
... then ask where you met her...

MIKE
Yeah, I'll tell her I don't remember and
then I'll ask what she looks like.
(pause)
Then I'll ask if we fucked. How's that,
Tee? Is that "the money"?

The guys laugh.

TRENT
Laugh all you want, but if you call to
soon you can scare off a nice baby who's
ready to party.

SUE
Don't listen to him. You call whenever
it feels right to you.

MIKE
How long are you guys gonna wait to call
your honeys?

TRENT & SUE
Six days.

 

[ezsmile]

I think TTT makes the most sense here.

Just do it during normal waking hours, like Justaguy and Jaman said. I once had a girl call me at 1 in the morning, from a chat line. I suppose she was drunk calling, but waking me up in the wee hours made sure I never called her back (and I don't get that many calls either).

 

[CJ Tylers]

Well, I called today at quarter past 11 :| I thought it'd be a safe time, but she was sleeping in. I appologized for waking her and left it at that... even though I said who I was, I doubt she was awake enough to figure out the connection.

Apparently she'll call me back.

For some reason, I'm not holding my breath on that one.

Oh well...

 

[TotallyTouchin]

Funny!

I never knew guys thought so hard about this stuff! The guys I've dated just call me right away and I wouldn't have given my number to them if I didn't want to hear from them.

Acting all "suave" and making a "rule" about three days is really kinda weird to me....not in a bad way but just surprises me I guess. When you want to talk to a girl you met call her ONCE and say hi or whatever and trust me...she'll like it. Overthinking things in dating is weird. I don't play games when I date- so no...not everyone does. The guys who stand out for me are the ones who are confident but not weird stalker guys (Swingers lol....I love that scene where he calls and calls that poor girl )

I say be you. Call her cause she obviously likes you or she wouldn't have given you her number. And who DOESN'T want to hear from the person they like??? Have fun on your date!!!

 

[Cousin Vinni]

Stop the madness!

One solution: Just go to see a SP or two. This is the whole reason why the industry exist. All these wondering, mind games, waiting games, guessing games. None of these shit from any of the girls here.

 

[aznboi9]

I never knew guys thought so hard about this stuff! The guys I've dated just call me right away and I wouldn't have given my number to them if I didn't want to hear from them.

Acting all "suave" and making a "rule" about three days is really kinda weird to me....not in a bad way but just surprises me I guess. When you want to talk to a girl you met call her ONCE and say hi or whatever and trust me...she'll like it. Overthinking things in dating is weird. I don't play games when I date- so no...not everyone does. The guys who stand out for me are the ones who are confident but not weird stalker guys (Swingers lol....I love that scene where he calls and calls that poor girl )

I say be you. Call her cause she obviously likes you or she wouldn't have given you her number. And who DOESN'T want to hear from the person they like??? Have fun on your date!!!

Here, here!

You go girl!

 

[athaire]

Lol.........this is a great read. Tiff you don't realize how often we agonize over nonsense like this when it is someone we like..........

 

[87112]

High School 101 is in session

 

[TotallyTouchin]

LOL! Athaire you crack me up!

Yeah I guess I'm the only girl to chime into this thread so I can only speak for myself but I have ALOT of friends who are girls and we all tend to be EXCITED for the guy we like to call us.

Haha! Total highschool...pass the note stuff huh??? Funny lol.

When I go on a date and the guy calls me back and is like "just wanted to call to tell you I had a wicked time and wish you sweet dreams" or something sweet and cute and short like that...I totally melt. If when I first give my number to a guy and he just shoots me a quick text or gives a call just to be like "great meeting you and can't wait to get to know you better"..I always am happy and think it's romantic.

I don't give my number to weird desperate guys lol , so if the guy calls me right away like how I outlined, I would never think it was desperate in the least...just sweet.

There ARE some of us who don't over analyse things (I am one of them I suppose) when it comes to dating. We gave you our number and we want to hear from you. Call like I said ONCE and then take it from there. Hard to get is obvious and lame TO ME but I guess some girls dig it. I just don't happen to be one of them.]. I just like a guy who comes right out there and calls when he's thinking about me. So do most of my girlfriends. It shows you like us and what is sexier than a guy who is hot for you??? NUTHIN!

Now we need reports back about the date!

 

[SInCity67]

And for me only...the guys that I end up dating are always the ones who just take the straight approach and call me right away. It shows that there are no games...they're totally stoked to talk to me and that they have no confidence issues etc. I would never be like "oh this dude has to be desperate cause he CALLED ME!"

The thing is...we LIKE it when you call us right away. We like it when we just left a date and you call us back and tell us that you had a blast and just wanted to say goodnight again. Those guys have been the ones who completely stood out for me. Just shows thought.

You never want to be the weird dude who calls ten times and whatnot but a quick call just to be like "it was great meeting you...I'm totally excited to take you out and I'm thinking about it right now so I just wanted to call you to tell you"...makes a girl feel totally important and like the guy is one of those confident characters we are all attracted to.

This myth goes around that people should wait to call and blah blah whatever is sooooooo 10 years ago. If you're thinking of her...give her a quick call to say hi...say she's great and hot and you like her and that's that. WE LOVE that stuff...ladies???? Can I get an amen?

Have fun in any case CJT!

Good advice, i like to add some input.


You should always call the next day day, you get the number. Only talk for a couple mins. though. Never set up a date for the first call, this call is only to see is she gave you the right number ( sucks stressing about a number for 2 days only to find out its fake ! ) And get to know the girl a bit more.


Another thing, I would like to say, have a good hobby to talk about too. For me, its wind surfing, rock climbing, skateboarding, working out and im going to be getting in Sky diving ( first time, doing it is on tuesday ) You want to talk about your self, because women, all they do is talk about them selves! You have to show a higher social value then every other male that has hit on her since she got her big little titties !