I've been burning the candle at both ends for the past 6 months and it finally caught up with me and I've been feeling rather under the weather. So since I was staying in bed solo, getting some much needed rest, I figured that I'd indulge in the Uber-Chick-Flick - Sex and the City.
I have to confess that I was a regular watcher when it first came out. I did find it rather witty (come one, it had it's moments) and enjoyed it's brazenness. Maybe I grew up, or maybe my taste has become more refined, or maybe read: probably it was really just that lame.
I'm so glad I watched it free online! I mean I had low expectations but it failed to even meet those. It was like a limbo party.... with with freakishly flexible Cirque de Soleil stars... just low can you go? Low. Very low. It was so bad that I had to watch it in 3 separate chunks, waiting for the bad taste and "was it really that bad" sensation to wear off before picking up where I left off.
You know it's bad when the the writers have to resort to having Miss Prissy Pants actually poop her pants in order to get a laugh.
And even that was done poorly.
The character's are even more 2-d than before. Big's character is nothing more than a male Real Doll with no backbone and a big bankroll. Carrie is even more vapid and self-and-label-centred than before. Miranda is miserable bag, who, surprise surprise, has stopped grooming herself or having sex (tell me you didn't see that coming). And Charlotte is just as prissy and prozaced into perpetual happiness as before.
I don't recall a single sex scene (it was actually billed as Sex and the City?) or even particularly graphic conversation about sex. In fact, during the one scene that I recall taking place involving a conversation about sex, Charlotte's adopted daughter present, so the characters actually referred to sex as "colouring."
I can't comment on the cinematography or direction as it was a bad "filmed from beside the projector" version. Given the weakness of the dialogue and plot, I wouldn't be at all surprised to find out that the transition scenes were actually intended to be blurred for the first 20 seconds. Perhaps they ran over budget on "soften the focus and take off 10 years" lens vaseline, and it was just cheaper to blur about 10% of the film.
It seems whomever writes for CSI Miami had significant creative input and was in charge of the trying-to-be-witty dialogue. Half of the conversation served no other purpose other than 1) fill the hellaciously and unnecessarily LOOOOOOONG running time of 130 minutes, yes 2 entire hours and 10 minutes, 2) setting up one-liner's so bad that Horatio Cane himself would roll his eyes and snicker with disgust. I fully expected lines to be delivered with a "buh-dump-ah" drum roll and canned laughter.
The only thing that I enjoyed about the movie was the lightbulb moments when the 2 least likable female characters realize that their men aren't so bad and that, in fact, it's the women who are narcissistic bitches who make the lives of their respective SOs miserable. Kudos for the one and only dose of reality working it's way into the plot. Perhaps Greg-He's-Just-Not-That-Into-You-Behrendt is working on a new book called "Why the hell is he still with you, you miserable bitch?"?
I'm sure some people will find it amusing, and maybe even hopeful, but I doubt anyone would seriously find it either funny or well written, but then some people still eat pork-rinds and watch the Tyra Banks show.
I have to confess that I was a regular watcher when it first came out. I did find it rather witty (come one, it had it's moments) and enjoyed it's brazenness. Maybe I grew up, or maybe my taste has become more refined, or maybe read: probably it was really just that lame.
I'm so glad I watched it free online! I mean I had low expectations but it failed to even meet those. It was like a limbo party.... with with freakishly flexible Cirque de Soleil stars... just low can you go? Low. Very low. It was so bad that I had to watch it in 3 separate chunks, waiting for the bad taste and "was it really that bad" sensation to wear off before picking up where I left off.
You know it's bad when the the writers have to resort to having Miss Prissy Pants actually poop her pants in order to get a laugh.
And even that was done poorly.The character's are even more 2-d than before. Big's character is nothing more than a male Real Doll with no backbone and a big bankroll. Carrie is even more vapid and self-and-label-centred than before. Miranda is miserable bag, who, surprise surprise, has stopped grooming herself or having sex (tell me you didn't see that coming). And Charlotte is just as prissy and prozaced into perpetual happiness as before.
I don't recall a single sex scene (it was actually billed as Sex and the City?) or even particularly graphic conversation about sex. In fact, during the one scene that I recall taking place involving a conversation about sex, Charlotte's adopted daughter present, so the characters actually referred to sex as "colouring."
I can't comment on the cinematography or direction as it was a bad "filmed from beside the projector" version. Given the weakness of the dialogue and plot, I wouldn't be at all surprised to find out that the transition scenes were actually intended to be blurred for the first 20 seconds. Perhaps they ran over budget on "soften the focus and take off 10 years" lens vaseline, and it was just cheaper to blur about 10% of the film.
It seems whomever writes for CSI Miami had significant creative input and was in charge of the trying-to-be-witty dialogue. Half of the conversation served no other purpose other than 1) fill the hellaciously and unnecessarily LOOOOOOONG running time of 130 minutes, yes 2 entire hours and 10 minutes, 2) setting up one-liner's so bad that Horatio Cane himself would roll his eyes and snicker with disgust. I fully expected lines to be delivered with a "buh-dump-ah" drum roll and canned laughter.
The only thing that I enjoyed about the movie was the lightbulb moments when the 2 least likable female characters realize that their men aren't so bad and that, in fact, it's the women who are narcissistic bitches who make the lives of their respective SOs miserable. Kudos for the one and only dose of reality working it's way into the plot. Perhaps Greg-He's-Just-Not-That-Into-You-Behrendt is working on a new book called "Why the hell is he still with you, you miserable bitch?"?
I'm sure some people will find it amusing, and maybe even hopeful, but I doubt anyone would seriously find it either funny or well written, but then some people still eat pork-rinds and watch the Tyra Banks show.
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