Monogamy is over-rated

LisbethNova

Elite Adult Entertainer
It took me until the age of 30 to finally accept that monogamy is bullshit. In fact, the very idea makes absolutely no sense at all to me and the idea is terrifying.
Now being in the hobby world and seeing a number of lovely married men, I realized just how much monogamy does not work and that many women (and men) are in complete denile that this is something even humanly possible.
From what I have analyzed in my experiences both in and out of the hobby world, majority of people cheat and if they are not already cheating, then they are in one hell of a torturous relationship where they are either in denile about sexuality or have lost interest in sex altogether... or maybe they just play the skin flute to keep their sanity, (my guess is that this is probably VERY true).
Hobbying in my opinion is not cheating, but is simply a release for those stuck in such mongamous relationships. I can honestly say that if my man went and paid for a service, I would find that a hell of a lot less threatening than if he were to be screwing someone from work.I have come to understand that most married gents who hobby probably feel the same way.
I often wish the wives of these gents would see the value in having more sexually open relationships. But I often wonder, if their wives and girlfriends were more open, could these men handle it?
I am not saying that monogamy is impossible or that some people are not happy in it at all.. but if the general population of women were raised to think of sex in a positive way, maybe they would be more open to sexual exploration with their husbands...

What are your thoughts?
 

clu

Active member
Oct 3, 2010
1,268
14
38
Vancouver
This seems focused on men who feel unfulfilled in monogamous relationships. What about women? There isn't as much a demand for male escorts by women yet women have as health an appetite. What do you say to that?
 

uncleg

Well-known member
Jul 25, 2006
5,652
839
113
It took me until the age of 30 to finally accept that monogamy is bullshit. In fact, the very idea makes absolutely no sense at all to me and the idea is terrifying.
Now being in the hobby world and seeing a number of lovely married men, I realized just how much monogamy does not work and that many women (and men) are in complete denile that this is something even humanly possible.
From what I have analyzed in my experiences both in and out of the hobby world, majority of people cheat and if they are not already cheating, then they are in one hell of a torturous relationship where they are either in denile about sexuality or have lost interest in sex altogether... or maybe they just play the skin flute to keep their sanity, (my guess is that this is probably VERY true).
Hobbying in my opinion is not cheating, but is simply a release for those stuck in such mongamous relationships. I can honestly say that if my man went and paid for a service, I would find that a hell of a lot less threatening than if he were to be screwing someone from work.I have come to understand that most married gents who hobby probably feel the same way.
I often wish the wives of these gents would see the value in having more sexually open relationships. But I often wonder, if their wives and girlfriends were more open, could these men handle it?
I am not saying that monogamy is impossible or that some people are not happy in it at all.. but if the general population of women were raised to think of sex in a positive way, maybe they would be more open to sexual exploration with their husbands...

What are your thoughts?

http://perb.cc/vbulletin/showthread.php?208448-Fellow-sapiophiles-and-spelling-grammar-enthusiasts
 

Ms Erica Phoenix

Satisfaction Provider
Jun 24, 2013
5,314
7
0
60
In Your Wildest Dreams!
Perb is not friendly...
PERB goes through bumps and ripples. PERB is not like other -ERB boards from what I can tell. The Lounge used to be a very VERY active and social place. MANY escorts There were joke threads, song threads, GIF threads, menu threads....the list goes on! There are some new members who never seem happier than when they are making other people miserable. They never have anything positive to say, but if there's a chance to make a nasty antiSP biased comment, they'll pile on. They don't seem to understand that the reason we 'are allowed to' participate here is because our paid advertisng (used to?) keep the lights on and the site up! Some of these new members seem determined to tear anyone positive apart. Some of them seem unwilling to see escorts as anything but interchangeable parts and holes, so they have no interest in hearing your thoughts or in sharing theirs on matters not related to best blowjobs, etc....

Pay no attention. Speak your mind, share your thoughts, welcome to Vancouver, and welcome to PERB.
 

morementum

Member
Aug 22, 2012
787
13
18
Dear morementum. That is rude why would you make a comment like that?
Uh, someone asked for my thoughts and that was first one I had. Clearly it is not your thought so that is fine too. Apparently if someone asks for "your thoughts" and you don't give one that they like it is then not acceptable?
 

Riza

Filipina MILF
Jun 3, 2013
1,293
1,025
113
Richmond incall
riza.ca
I have come to the conclusion that EXPECTING monogamy isn't realistic. The only thing I expect is respect. If my partner wants to see escorts, fine! I won't be jealous, because I understand the industry. However, I won't agree to him seeing civvie girls though, because I think emotional lines are far more likely to be blurred.

This industry has made me realize that I would enjoying swinging, under the right circumstances too :D I have some fun ideas, and I'm sure one day I'll get to explore them...
Maybe we will see you at Club Allure Miss Melody. :clap2:
 

too timid

optimist
Dec 5, 2013
49
66
18
valley
Welcome to B.C. Interesting and provocative post for this board .

I'll try to make my thoughts relevant to the title / topic.

We all choose or brainwash ourselves as to what what makes us happy . Monogamy works for some of the people some of the time .

At one point I was very happy with being in an exclusive sexually monogamous relationship with comfort , safety , security, personal exploration ,passion , acknowledgement and acceptance being a few of the perks . As it turned into a celibate monogamous relationship I was no longer content . I was the proverbial skin flute for many years , and while I was thankful of that it was a loss on many levels and a sign if what was to come .

My partner is a very strong willed / minded feminine , along with doctor diagnosed low sex drive ( pretty obvious) I feel that she wasn't taught to see sex as positive or necessary. Nor is she even able to communicate about it . Unfortunately I don't feel the same way . That spark ,thrill or desire is what put the whole relationship in motion , and dialogue is crucial in any relationship .

I'm sure that during the sexual time in the relationship I would have been able to deal with a bit of an open relationship as I was confident and content. During my time as the skin flute I wouldn't have been as I was no longer being accepted or desired more akin to being serviced .

While my physical rejection has cost my physical desire in her , I do wish she could free her mind and be a sexual person , to have that gleam in her eye , the strut in her walk , the glow in her soul , even if not by me . We are wired to feel many positive emotions from our sexual selves and I feel we have been wasting time.

At this point in my life i would be fine with an open relationship and could even take joy in someone else's pleasure , as long my own needs were being met . The neglect of my own sexuality is what brings me down and I do not wish that on any decent person much less a partner .
 

beginner

Banned
Jul 11, 2014
121
0
0
are either in denile
The longest river in the world.

Hobbying in my opinion is not cheating
Of course it's cheating, whenever you deceive someone you profess to love, it's cheating.

I can honestly say that if my man went and paid for a service, I would find that a hell of a lot less threatening than if he were to be screwing someone from work.
I can honestly say, I would rather drown in 3 feet of water, than 10 feet of water. :confused:

Of course you think this way, you are an escort...how could you be an escort and think otherwise?
 

beginner

Banned
Jul 11, 2014
121
0
0
Well said Erica!! I have had a number of PM's from ladies who say they don't participate here because they get bullied and eaten alive if they persist in participating. We pay to be here, and participating on the board is a part of of our business as well as socializing with everyone else who has the right to be here.
comments deleted...in deference to moderation.
 

Slapshot1

New member
May 27, 2014
160
0
0
Mile 62 Saskatchewan
Most people enter a marriage with full intention to remain monogamous, unless both parties were "open" beforehand. And for the first while, things are great. All of a sudden, sex with you becomes a chore. She dangles the prospects of it over your head like a dog being rewarded for not shitting on the carpet. Yet, she never initiates anything, then looks at you and wonders what your problem is? When that magical time does arrive, she expects to be "serviced" without returning the favor.

Wonder why people stray? It's inevitable, yet even with the best of intentions to remain loyal to one, it can be a frustrating time for sure.

So, what do we do? Go out, have an affair? I say fuck that! With social media and the way people are, you wouldn't have even pulled out and the whole city would know what you are up to. Ashley Madison? Fucking scam!

That leaves really only one option left. Thank you ladies for being there for us.
Why is it that sex only becomes a priority when you're caught doing it with someone else? Being taken for granted day after day, month after month can cut deeper than one realizes.
 
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