I need some advise, please...

[yumiko]

Hi everyone,

It's Yumiko. I need some advise/suggestions from all of you guys/ladies on this matter. I've been having problems with an obsessed client turned psycho stalker who used to be a member on this board but he was banned for writing personal info/my private life on this board. But then he moved on to other boards complaining bitching about perb, saying how perb is silly, sucks, etc. I used to see him many times until he became obsessed with me to the point he called me every day, and when I do not answer his call, he'll leave threatening messages on my phone and keep leaving me messages, filling up my voice mail, he even asked me to meet his parents(!). I refused to see him and he got really mad. That's why I've been laying low and keeping a low profile because I'm really worried and scared about my personal safety. I've noticed that some people have been saying that I am very hard to get a hold of, I'm sorry but I'm scared to answer my phone because this guy calls me at all times using different numbers everytime. And now since he's been banned from this board, he now goes to other boards and started writing nasty and untrue rumours about myself. He even private messaged some of the members of the other board who fortunately happens to be my regular clients and they told me that this psycho guy pm them very very rude and offensive stuff about me which is ofcourse are not true forcing them not to see me anymore. So, is there any suggestions on how to deal with this matter?

Sincerely,
Yumiko

 

[SUCKCESSFULL]

Hi Yumiko,


I'm sorry that this has happened to you and I guess this is one of the dangers one faces as an escort. Have you tried reasoning with him? Have you tried getting a restraining order on this guy? And if worst comes to worst, maybe you should hire some people to get rough on this stalker's fruity ass.

 

[dogg1]

Yumiko, I 'm sorry to hear of your situation. Jerks like this give the rest of us a bad name. My first response would be to reason with this individual. Secondly, forward these nasty remarks to the moderator of the board that he's on inorder to get him banned. Finally, improve your prescreening procedures and file for a restraining order against him. I know other sps have gone through this ordeal at one point. What do the other ladies think of this matter?

 

[ButtMan]

Is there any legal thing that you could do to get rid of these crazy motherfucker. Report him to the police or hire a PI to deal with him or speak to a lawyer. Do something, deal with the problem now and don't just sit around and wait for matters to get worse.

 

[yumiko]

Thank you soooo much everyone for all your concersn and suggestions regarding this matter. However, I don't think I could file a restraining order against this guy since he lives accross the border though he'd come up from time to time to Vancouver and among all of the hotels in the city chose to stay at the hotel right accross the street from me and he'd buzz me from downstairs though he didn't have appt. to see me. I'm thinking of moving to different location and probably change my numbers or give out a special secret phone number for my regular clients so it'd be easy for them to get a hold of me and told all my new clients not to post any phone number at all if they are supposed to put a review about me

 

[BS Detector]

Sorry to hear of your problem

I would suggest not even bothering to try and reason with the guy. If he is just a guy who has fallen for you, sure. Since he is making threats, he HAS to know what he is doing is wrong and ILLEGAL. He sounds like he is beyond reason and might even take your attempts to reason as encouragement that you 'care' about him. I would suggest that since he has crossed the line and done illegal stuff, this is a police matter as of immediately.

I'm not to sure what , if anything CBSA can do until he has a record. Once he is charged a/o convicted, CBSA will most likely deal with him at the border and possibly deny entry.

 

[spaceghost]

However, I don't think I could file a restraining order against this guy since he lives accross the border

I do believe you can still have a restraining order filed against him and you can rest assured that he still reads this board.

With that in mind, I wonder if he realizes the impact this would have on his ability to travel freely back and forth across the border?

Given his obsessive behaviour... I wonder how attractive he would be to the city police/rcmp task force investigating assaults on street workers in the greater Vancouver area?

Perhaps none of this fazes him?

If he continues to contact you... definately file a complaint with the City Police or the Royal Canadian Mounted Police. They will advise you on the best path to pursue regarding a restraining order.

I don't think the silly bugger realizes the amount of grief he can bring upon himself.

 

[bigdman]

nice advice, spaceghost..........

 

[Massagegirl]

Get him girl, you can do it!

I agree with BSD and others, tape the treatening messages and call the police over as soon as possible to file a complaint and ask to press charges of stalking or harrassment. Tell them everything you know about him, confidentiality in this business applies to non-psychos only! They will go to his hotel and speak with him and if he makes any threats or fights with the police (he IS a wacko after all) they will arrest him and you won't even come into it. If you feel nervous dealing with the police, run down to city hall and buy an escort liscence, I believe in Van they are $150?

Don't hide, cuz he won't stop. Answer the phone every time and when it is him tell him he has really hurt your feelings, as you thought there was a connection, and that he is scaring you and you feel he will try to kill you next. Then say you had no choice but to call the police, so where can they get in touch with him for a "talk"? My guess is that because of your heritage he may think you are too submissive/shy to confront him. Well, won't he get a surprise?!

As to booking others it will be tricky to avoid him until the cops have a record of him and as was mentioned earlier, he gets stopped at the border. The Americans will take it more seriously, especially if he doesn't have a legitimate reason to come up here. Look through the peephole before you let anyone in, or better yet, move somewhere where there is a surveillance camera at the front door so you can see everyone before you buzz them in.

Ladies in this biz should not have to hide from wackos!!!! What you are doing is LEGAL so have him brought down, before he hurts you or others. Just imagine if you were a hairdresser who worked from home, would you not be furious if some loser tried this shit!! Get mad, get very very mad! I hope he calls me cuz I'm gonna rip a strip off him and make it into a necklace!

As to the other boards, ask someone who recieved one of those pms to forward it to the owner/moderater and have him removed as a threat to society. Sucks that you have to do it , someone should have complained by now, I guess they aren't as conscientious as the members here are.

Good luck Yumiko, this will be the toughest thing you ever do but in the end I promise you will feel so good about it. You will feel safe because you will be safe, no more looking over your shoulder! Please keep us appraised of developments, we are here for you.

 

[johndoe]

I agree with massagegirl, you should email or ask one of your clients who receive pm from this stalker and ask them to forward or file a complain to the moderator because IMHO no board will allow any of its members to write a derogatory remarks attacking other members or sp and deliberately posting false reviews in order to ruin some sp reputation just because he hold a grudge against her for whatever reasons. This guy is a loser and he needs to get a life or find other things to do than bothering working girls. Gezz, what a weirdo. PM if you need help or more suggestions. Good Luck!!

 

[hitrack]

Yumiko forget all that. The next time he fiddle fucks around buzzing your room let him in. Myself and anyother Perberts will be waiting to deal with him. He would not be bothering you anymore.

Being a spotter for 2 SW's in my time I had to deal with ugly situations in which gettin mid evil on someones ass was the only solution. I also appologize for any increase in ICBC rates after what I did to his car.

 

[AsianBrother]

I think everyone's said it so far but I have to put my 2 cents in... Call the police and explain them the situation... you should be able to get a restraining order put against him and if the threats continue, you can get him charged with uttering a threat which, when convicted, will ensure that he doesn't enter this country again.

 

[AsianBrother]

Yumiko forget all that. The next time he fiddle fucks around buzzing your room let him in. Myself and anyother Perberts will be waiting to deal with him. He would not be bothering you anymore.

I'm with ya bro...

 

[kahuna_01]

Customs and Immigration. Call em.....that'll take care of it. Does he carry a handgun ? Does he bring drugs with him ? Get his license plate # and his name .......thats all ya need sweetie.

 

[williewheeler]

Yumiko:

You may file charges against him with the police. You may turn over your telephone messages (edited if you wish to contain only his) to the police. He will be charged with stalking, uttering threats (including possibly death threats dependent on the contents of the tape). The Crown will file a warrant for his arrest with Canada Customs. Should he try to cross the border for any reason, he will be arrested and detained. The least consequence he will receive is a Peace Bond. This is sufficient to keep him from entering BC from the US again, providing Canada Customs is aware. It's unlikely that you will be "outed," as your profession is not pertinent to the crime being committed, it's merely the circumstance by which the guy got your telephone number.

You may also sue this asshole civily, if you know his real name. Call Lawyer Referral (you may obtain the number from the Canadian Bar Association, BC Branch, ph. (604) 687-3404, or check the website at www.cba.org). They will give you the name of a lawyer whose office is convenient to you, and you may make an appointment with the lawyer for a half-hour appointment for $10. He or she will advise you as to whether you have a case and the likelihood of litigation being successful. The drawback of this course of action is that you will be "outed" if the guy tries to defend himself as it will form part of his testimony in all likelihood. As with all litigation, the trick is collecting on any damages the court may award you.

PM me if you need further information.

 

[sushiman]

Another suggestion

Ditch your present phone #'s.

Get a pager service that gives a caller only enough time to speak his name, callback number and little else.

Get a blocked # service for your active phone.

Call into your pager periodically to collect messages and only return those you choose to.

This in addition to the excellent suggestions above.

Good luck and wishing you success.

 

[Sir Woodster]

Yumiko - the next time this guy causes a problem, dial 911

Yes you can get a restraining order - it is enforceable in Canada and the Border people can know its there.

Saraphina is right - contact the support organization she refers to, they can guide you through the process.

Call a lawyer - they can help.

 

[dogg1]

Yumiko, please be careful. I hope this lowlife does not mimick the actions of this slasher in Winnipeg. Please pm me if you need any help. I 'll be HAPPY to shit kick this turd for you.

 

[Venn]

Sounds like that could get your shoes really messy!!

 

[nixnix]

hi yumiko

sorry to hear about this...it sucks that he's ruining it all for the rest of us....personally, i have lost faith in the vancouver police. it seems that they don't do the right things and go after the wrong bad guys so i'm guessing they'll just sit on their hands with this one but instead run after AMPs and SWs and such. Have you considered hiring a mechanic..heh heh