Do you get laid outside of SPs?

[tobleroney]

Dumb question but im pretty curious about this. I know alot of guys who go to SPs are married/have gfs that don't have sex with them so that's the reason they go to SPs

For me, I realized I've been going for almost 8 years now and i've never actually had sex with a "normal" girl. I guess maybe its an addiction and I'm getting worried as I'm reaching the age where I should have a long term gf or wife and I've never been able to get dates with girls.

Anyone else in the same boat?

 

[nightswhisper]

I am single but see SP's mostly for fantasy / fetish scenarios that I don't feel comfortable discussing or sharing with regular women.

In general I have a roster of 2 - 5 girls I see on a regular basis that I don't have to "pay cash" for, excluding dates, wine and dine, travel and shopping.

I never see SP's while in a committed relationship.

I'm terrified of the notion of not having some sort of a healthy romantic / pseudo-romantic relationship and strictly see SPs.

 

[Applebaum]

.. I've never been able to get dates with girls. Anyone else in the same boat?

That is pretty much my situation. Plus I can see girls who I could NEVER even attempt to date.

 

[johnnydepth]

O.P., I guess the question is why aren't you dating outside of SP's?
If it is fear of rejection, you might want to visit a professional psychologist to discuss.
If it is being shot down too often, I suggest playing the numbers. When I'm single and wanting to date I probably try to engage with at least 100 or more women in any given month. This could be online or in person; The point being I date a lot but I get shot down a hell of a lot. Out of say 100, if 5 or so say yes I'm a happy camper.

 

[2bfair]

If you are older, fairly good looking, and a stage musician, women tend to want to cling on to you if you show any stamina or size and are polite. I always loved monogamus relationships with the gals other than that. I have had enough x's that sp's and a nsa ffwbs is much better than having someone want half your stuff. No sleep overs I tell gals now and nsa or its not a go. i am glad i never saw an sp until after being married twice etc as it would haunt me if my gf or wife couldnt measure up in the bedroom.

Always used to ask at a table of ladies "would anyone of you like to dance?" and usually 2 or 3 would join me and later one would tell me another likes me and i would ask her to dance. bing bang boom! like said above its a numbers game..

I pick energy over looks anyday

 

[islander1-1]

Back in the 80s I was seeing a cpl of SPs, I suppose to avenge the wife for seeing other guys. She is now my ex of course.
Currently seeing SPs because I am not getting any at home due to menopause. I love her to pieces but.... situation I suppose.

 

[lukom]

I started visiting SP's because of a girl I was dating at the time had fantasized about watching me have sex with other girls. Things got weird after that when she asked me to change things up and for me to do her gay best, I wasn't in the slightest bit bi-curious and things didn't last long after that. I have been in and out of the his hobby ever since for 10 years, depending on if I've been in a relationship or not. I do have some friends with benefits here or there, but I prefer SP's as there's less strings attached.

 

[UhOh]

È

For me, I realized I've been going for almost 8 years now and i've never actually had sex with a "normal" girl.

It can be hard to crawl out of a hole but you're doing something wrong and need to identify where changes have to be made.

 

[spongemike]

Yup. I feel having sex with a gf I actually get more excited. Maybe there is an emotion attachment there vs a SP who is having seen with you for money even though they act like a gf

 

[Kingpin29]

It can be hard to crawl out of a hole but you're doing something wrong and need to identify where changes have to be made.

When you're deep in the rabbit hole, it's definitely hard to climb out. But nothing is in the realm of impossible. It's just takes time and addressing where problems need to be fixed.
For sure having sex with a gf is much more intimate and exciting (also time isn't a factor). Sex with an SP is just to satisfy a lust, and when money gets involved, always have to remember that is the fine line between fantasy and reality.

 

[Addison Cortez]

... so, there’s a reason for it...Find out why and if you’re okay with that or not. Only you can answer this.

I haven’t found what I’m looking for, is my reason... maybe I never will.

 

[tobleroney]

O.P., I guess the question is why aren't you dating outside of SP's?
If it is fear of rejection, you might want to visit a professional psychologist to discuss.
If it is being shot down too often, I suggest playing the numbers. When I'm single and wanting to date I probably try to engage with at least 100 or more women in any given month. This could be online or in person; The point being I date a lot but I get shot down a hell of a lot. Out of say 100, if 5 or so say yes I'm a happy camper.

yeah I get shot down quite a bit and don't really go to bars/clubs anymore as I'm getting a bit older and I also don't want to approach women at the gym or other places I go as it can make things awkward afterwards.

È

It can be hard to crawl out of a hole but you're doing something wrong and need to identify where changes have to be made.

yeah it's really bad. Whenever I see an attractive girl in public I just try to think of an SP that looks similar to that so I can contact her later. It sucks

 

[2bfair]

yeah I get shot down quite a bit and don't really go to bars/clubs anymore as I'm getting a bit older and I also don't want to approach women at the gym or other places I go as it can make things awkward afterwards.



yeah it's really bad. Whenever I see an attractive girl in public I just try to think of an SP that looks similar to that so I can contact her later. It sucks

Be a volunteer where others volunteer in your community and you never know who you may meet.. Or coaching makes you meet a great amount of people..

Some people in your shoes buy a high end tpe sex doll ..

 

[Aesthetics>all]

Yes and no. I see Sp’s because they are generally cheaper for me than a hotel room and parking for a night let alone drinks ... I live in a place filled with gross hippy climbers that don’t bathe and live in their vans so local talent is next to 0, and the whole 2.5hr round trip commute multiple times a week while dating thing doesn’t work for me very well, other than a 4 month period where I legitimately tried to date a girl in new west, its been all ONS and SP’s for the last 3 years now

 

[DangerousDan]

... so, there’s a reason for it...Find out why and if you’re okay with that or not. Only you can answer this.

I haven’t found what I’m looking for, is my reason... maybe I never will.

That's a very different take on how I see the world and relationships. I think there are lots and lots of people out there for everybody and that there is no such thing as a perfect partner. I think all relationships have incompatibilities and I think those things actually help a relationship to mature and advance. Maybe you have too many items on your checklist. Maybe if you stick with the big ones, you'll see more opportunities.

 

[Sinset]

Just SPs for the past few years. I have self esteem/self image issues that held me back. Slowly working through it now. Life is getting better

 

[204fun]

While I am able to have sex on a regular basis in my civ life, there is a bit of monotony to that sex that comes from having a certain comfort level with that person. With SP's I know that I am going to get exactly what I am looking for every time, even if what I am looking for changes each time I see an SP. That includes the variety that really only comes from having sex with different people.

 

[UhOh]

Be a volunteer where others volunteer in your community and you never know who you may meet.. Or coaching makes you meet a great amount of people..

Or register on Meetup. Taking part in activities that interest you will help you meet people with similar interests.

 

[Addison Cortez]

That's a very different take on how I see the world and relationships. I think there are lots and lots of people out there for everybody and that there is no such thing as a perfect partner. I think all relationships have incompatibilities and I think those things actually help a relationship to mature and advance. Maybe you have too many items on your checklist. Maybe if you stick with the big ones, you'll see more opportunities.

I give up. I've done that etc etc etc but this isn't about me.... It hasn't been eight years though 8 months maybe? Is it bad that I can't actually remember? I prefer my work life (right now).

 

[Addison Cortez]

my last boyfriend, (my last good one at least) he wasn't a model... he wasn't rich... he was definitely very tall but he was in music and sciences his whole life... never had a girlfriend in high school, or college or even afterwards..... he was awkward around people and made a lot of childish jokes. People used to look at us funny, all the time, because he didn't look like he belonged with me. I'm not being vain, a lot of people actually said that to me! It hurt me to hear that, because I loved him.. probably still do, and he was, and still is a great guy.

To you two that never get chicks:

-there's one out there, that everyone thinks is out of out of their league, and she's dying for a real guy to come along....