Any advice please

[Mr.C]

I've thought about the pros and cons to posting about a recent experienced I had. I had an overnight with a lady a few weeks ago and the sex part of the date was incredible but after that there wasn't the the cuddling and and what such that one would expect from an overnighter.

Like I mention the sex was incredible and we seem to get along but there was something missing from the whole experience. I don't think I'll see her again for overnighter but would still like to see her for shorter dates. My question is should I do this or what. Should I bring it up with her in private, which is what I think I should do as I feel that it would be the most productive for both sides.

Any thoughts out there and before anyone ask I won't name her.

 

[steverino]

Reviews are not surprisingly a key element of review boards. We share our experiences to help each other out.

 

[Sleepmonger]

It's your money man, if you are no longer interested in overnighters with her, then arrange shorter dates. If your chemistry in bed was incredible then there's no real reason not to see her at all just because your expectations of the overnight experience differed. I personally wouldn't bother discussing it with her, and would just hold off on booking overnighters. But, if you feel talking to her about it will effect enough of a change that you are willing to pay to try the overnighter again, then go for it.

 

[cherise]

you should write an honest review .that is the prpose of this board . wouldn't you have liked to have known that an overnight was a waste of money? perhaps you lost out but you can save others from doing the same

 

[TeddyBr29]

A few random thoughts for you to ponder C. First up, before you indulged in this overnighter, was it very clearly understood by the lady in question that you were looking for a GFE experience, and if so did she agree to it? Second, and related to the first question, does this lady offer GFE? Some ladies, for reasons of their own, do not offer GFE: one supposes that they may consider the relationship with gentlemen who are neither their lovers or significant others to be just business, and intimacy has no place in business. Once you've answered, honestly, the previous two points, then let us look at your track record with this lady...how long have you two known each other? If you're a relative newcomer to her, she may very well have agreed to an overnighter for economic reasons, but she may not be entirely comfortable being with you for an extended appointment: if she's not entirely comfortable with you it should be little wonder that she may have been reluctant to give you what you were looking for.

As for reviewing the lady in question, I would advise you to be even-handed and honest: what were your expectations when you encountered her, and did she agree to accommodate your preferences, and in the end did she fulfill them. The key condition of the previous sentence is that you be honest in all respects: if you are honest then being even-handed should follow nicely. I'm sure that most of the male readers in this forum will be most interested in your review.

 

[PlayfulAlex]

I've thought about the pros and cons to posting about a recent experienced I had. I had an overnight with a lady a few weeks ago and the sex part of the date was incredible but after that there wasn't the the cuddling and and what such that one would expect from an overnighter.

Like I mention the sex was incredible and we seem to get along but there was something missing from the whole experience. I don't think I'll see her again for overnighter but would still like to see her for shorter dates. My question is should I do this or what. Should I bring it up with her in private, which is what I think I should do as I feel that it would be the most productive for both sides.

Any thoughts out there and before anyone ask I won't name her.

I think it's difficult enough to imagine what a one- or two-hour appointment will entail, never mind an overnight. It is entirely possible that you didn't plan the 10-12 hours so succinctly that, for example, "by midnight, we'll have finished our sexual adventure and be deeply embraced, dozing off to sleep together."

And, perchance, did you have a few drinks during the evening? That can contribute to drowsiness.

It's highly probable that, after the sex, you guys took turns showering, and then hit the bed for 'lights out'! But, while your mind was flush with the excitement of the evening, your young lady friend was ready to fall asleep.

Without knowing that cuddling and pillow talk were important to you, she might have just thought that sleep was the next logical step.

Now, if you'd read other reviews of overnight adventures with the lady that included cuddling, you might be feeling seriously confused. Otherwise, this is just another wonderful example of how we have to be more explicit about our expectations, particularly on such a long encounter.

And, unless you're planning another overnighter with her, I wouldn't bother mentioning it, at this stage. Just chalk it up to a life experience.

 

[Master69]

Was this your first overnighter, Mr C?

I don't do overnighters myself because I see them as poor VFM. You're paying her to sleep. And I like to go home and sleep alone in my own bed. There seem to be more complaints along the VFM line for overnighters than for most other arrangements. Is it implied that there is some emotional "cuddling" experience that goes with overnighters that doesn't happen in a one-hour or multi-hour session, and that is the extra some pooners want?

I have seen one SP who posted a firm structure for an overnighter on her website, so the rules were clear. Something like this: 8 to 12 playtime (two shots) 12 to 7 no play (sleep time) 7 to 8 playtime (one shot). Nothing about "cuddle time". Is there a standard implied menu, like there is for GFE and PSE?

 

[badbadboy]

I have had a number of overnights plus a number of three or four night get aways. The sex has always been exactly what I was looking for and I was totally satisfied. Not often was there post coital cuddling etc but more of roll over have a brief snooze and when you are motivated, initiate another round .

I do recall reaching over once to pull her closer to me for a cuddle and it was not well received. My take is its sort of the "keep the client at a distance" thought they keep in their heads as a general rule. I don't know, maybe I am wrong on that one.

I resolved it by thinking if I have had three or four shots in a night that is what gave me enjoyment. Otherwise I would go for a GF, have a single shot and fall asleep in each other's arms. Depends what you value for your $

Nothing wrong with asking her about it IMHO.

 

[newatit]

well i have been a great overnight fan over the last few years with copious experiences that have varied. Yes, I have had gals who wrap themselves around you all night, respond to cuddling, sleep bare bum to bum, naked, clothed, partly clothed. Etc. sleep is one of those individual things, and some people get right into the warmth of it and others are so independent. I don't think you can blame the gal, those are her ways, and if not a fit you specified the answer already. Like one gal who has spent almost six years with me on several trips is a real cuddler, although as time wore on that wore out a bit. So I picked up with another one recently and first night was fantastic, then our first trip, well, we slept together, but she slept so soundly I don't think she knew I was there or where she was. Nice. But then there is a little Asian gal I have dated, and she is great up till the time you want to sleep. She stays in one spot on the bed, hardly moves, and is certainly not a pleasure to sleep with. Last trip, after some great bj, she took a pillow she brought, laid down on the floor, and curled up like a dog, and slept there all night. Not really the first time. She is off the payroll now for that.

Keep trying, but remember the more you know them, the less likely you are to be totally cuddled. Good sleep is important.

I wouldn't throw away a good gal over a sleep issue, just avoid that in the relationship.

 

[sevenofnine]

Some girls don't cuddle. Its just the way they are wired.
The best pse girl I ever came across would never cuddle. Never seem to relax during a session.

After the session she would ask me to stay, but she became like my wife, don't touch me, don't even sit next to me. It was like we had to keep a regulation of three feet of empty space between us. She wanted me to stay but don't fucking touch me. It was like I was with my wife.

The women I see now, she cuddles, hugs and all of that.
I have never noticed any difference, I mean I have stayed after a session, time has run out she goes to the fridge and pulls a beer, or just says stay. But nothing changes were nude in bed, hugging etc touching, time has run out but nothing has changed. I don't do anything it seems it would be rude, but it doesn't seem like she would stop me.
I have seen her off the clock and it seems the same I mean nothing seems to change, she is the same, whether I am paying her on not.

Im just saying women are what they are. That is the way they are wired.
I would be kind and gentle if I wrote a review. Mention it if you must, but be respectful and be as kind as you can.

I think you should give the women the benifit of the doubt, unless she breaks one of the rules that should never be broken, like ripping you off etc.

 

[Mr.C]

Thanks for all the replies so far and as I said before I don't really want to slam the lady LOL. I would like to find a solution which doesn't really cause any drama.

 

[Mr.C]

I try to be snuggly and girlfriend-like for over night visits. I can't always control how I am in my sleep (I can be a tad restless and toss and turn a bit) but I try to make it an intimate thing. Some guys want it to fall asleep with someone, some to wake up with someone, some want morning playtime and breakfast in bed... Some care about snuggles, some don't like snuggles (madness! ), and for some it depends how you click. I have had some great overnighters and some not so great ones.. But I try my best. I think if you can read her body language and maybe if you are being a bit too grabby or making her feel smothered then back off. I LOVE to cuddle but if I start to feel claustrophobic then I might get overwhelmed and it could show

Anyways it can go well! Try again with someone else, some people are better snugglers than others

You sound like someone I should see for an overnighter Vanesssa It's been a while since I've seen you ... I don't know why I haven't made a return visit

 

[Mr.C]

Thank you for that Vanesssa it sounds like great advice and I think that I will just let it be. By the way I hope you will have time for me to see you soon

 

[thebuttdance continues]

There are two girls I've seen recently that are very girlfriend-like. I also enjoy the whole intimacy experience, sharing a gentle embrace with a woman after a hot session of pillow turning and bed sheet pulling. I love putting my arm around a lovely, being the protector, and sharing a well-deserved power nap zzzzzz

I've seen Vanesssa once and I can put my word in that she loves to snuggle. Treat her well and with mutual comfort, cuddling comes naturally. I can say the same for Serina which I've had the pleasure to meet too.